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LET'S face it, there are welcome gifts and then there are welcome gifts. But spare a thought for the nine Palestinian women who made the 3,500 kilometre journey all the way from the Middle East to speak at Watford Trade Union Hall this week.

After sitting on a plane for the best part five hours and no doubt putting up with the rubbery supper and dodgy straight to video movies on offer, the women were then presented with their no-expense spared welcome "present".

Now, this diarist reckons a 15 course meal at The Grove would be the sort of gesture to compensate for such an extravagant journey.

Failing that, perhaps a gold plated necklace, or a trip to London to see some of our capital's famous sites.

Nope, nothing quite so dreary.

Instead, our jet lagged gals were given the much coveted gift of a guided tour of Watford.

At the risk of sounding facetious, what a treat they have in store.

Perhaps they can start by taking in the first of the Seven Wonders of Watford - The Hanging Hornet of the High Street.

Mid-morning would feature wonders two, three and four - namely the Colossus of the ring-Rhodes, The Great Pyramid/ furniture store of Watford, and the Impenetrable Glass of the Children's Peace Centre.

After lunch the lucky ladies could marvel at the splendour of the Bushey Arches Aviary, gaze at the Forgotten Indoor Market and finally take in the Mystery of the Domeless Dome roundabout.

I just hope they come again.

A CURIOUS "who done it" erupted at the Watford Observer this week after it emerged a brazen chancer (and one with a healthy appetite to boot) had enjoyed a free bit of grub on Three Rivers District Council's dollar.

Suspicious fingers were pointed after TRDC accused the fraud of posing as a WO photographer and gatecrashing the council's knees-up at swanky Moor Park Mansion on Saturday night.

The cheeky charlatan was accused of then merrily tucking into the feast of home cured salmon, followed by a duo of lamb served with dauphinoise potato and then washing down the dessert of caramelised apple tart with coffee and petit fours.

Rubbing salt into the wounds, it seemed the rogue had even brought his better half along for the craic.

As you can well imagine, shock spread across the office quicker than a tin of chocolates at Christmas.

"What?", you could hear from all corners of the newsroom, "you mean someone gave up their Saturday night to spend it with Councillor Amrit Mediratta and the "cool guys" from the licensing committee?"

I am pleased to say the mystery has now been solved and the impostor was actually non other than my conscientious fellow reporter Filip Hnizdo, who was diligently reporting on the bash.

If Filip's integrity remains in doubt please see his detailed report on Page 11 of today's newspaper..

Just to let everyone know, Filip has now been issued with a verbal warning about his future conduct and instructed - in the most stern manor possible - to improve his social life.

STICKING with last Saturday's charity bash, I couldn't go without mentioning the incredible generosity (not to mention questionable music taste) of Three Rivers District Councillor, Roger Seabourne, who stumped up an eye-watering £500 for a piece of music "history".

What was it I hear you ask?

Well, it was nothing less than a gold-plated album by everyone's (least) favourite warbler Cher.

Whether Councillor Seabourne is really a dedicated fan of the eccentric songster remains to be seen.

Word is, from none other than food-snatcher Filip Hnizdo, the kindly councillor simply raised his mitt to finish a slow moving lot and enable him to go home.

A good night's sleep, it seems, no matter what price to his wallet... or his reputation.

2:18pm Tuesday 25th March 2008

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