My flippin' Valentine (From Watford Observer)

My flippin' Valentine

4:56pm Saturday 13th February 2010

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By Claire Maxwell »

Tomorrow is Valentines day and I plan to spend it as I spend every other day. Single and content. (Perhaps with a heftier amount of chocolate).

I am not a fan of the consumerist, butt-clenchingly cringy nature of Valentines day. I only have to walk into Clintons and the will to live starts to rapidly evaporate.

I do not want an inappropriately large stuffed toy holding a sign declaring its love for me. I do not want a card dashed with hearts and flowers and cartoon couples smooching and saying things to each other that only leave me wanting to rip their faces off. And I do not want a heart-shaped balloon in a tacky shade of fuschia that will, lets face it, only ruin the ambiance of my bedroom.

I would not, however, say no to chocolate of any form. Even heart-shaped. *waits expectantly*

I'm single, and you might have sensed a slight taste of bitterness. However, I am not bitter about being alone on Valentines day. In fact I am rather pleased I do not have to invent an excuse as to why I do not want to spend tomorrow evening exchanging teddy bears at a below-average movie.

If you are spending tomorrow with you're partners I wish you luck and happiness, and hope beyond hope any tacky nylon gifts given do not catch fire to the romantic candle sitting between the two of you.

Actually, that’s a lie, I think that would be brilliant.

Anyway, if my obvious attitude to anything pink or heart-shaped hasn't put off any possible card-givers, I'm pretty sure this blog will have done it.

Happy Valentines day!