I'm still here! (From Watford Observer)

I'm still here!

11:11am Wednesday 12th May 2010

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Recently I have been neglecting the blogging community and for this I am ashamed and sorry. I have no inspiration. I sit in front of my laptop screen, sipping an apple juice and nibbling on my fourteen custard cream, and think to myself: “That is a good table, one of the best I’ve seen”. You see, I have a short attention span, and when I am not inspired I would literally rather being doing anything else, even shaving my own head. (That’s possibly not true, I have a funny shaped head). So after weeks of repeating this play of events I have decided that if I am not feeling inspired, then that’s what I’ll bloody well blog about. If anyone has a complaint or criticism about my incessant moaning and use of words that, probably, don’t mean what I think they mean, creating a confusing and illegible mass of words, please comment below and I will graciously ignore you.

Not only has my lack of motivation, determination and inspiration (did anyone else find that list of words undeniably annoying?) effected my blogging skills, it has also leaked into my A Level work. I make that sound as if my slacking were a rarity, much to the contrary. I probably do, on average, an hour of work a week. I am doing my A Levels via distance learning, so for someone who lacks motivation even when a shouting teacher with bad breath and a hairy face is involved, sitting at home, being accountable to no one, motivation is almost an impossible task. I have my first A Level exam in a week tomorrow. Unfortunately I have not even begun to cover one of the topics. I am hoping for and expecting good solid A’s.

It hasn’t all been bad though. Even in my most lazy state I still manage to fake tan my legs. Although, having said that, I have stopped using the one you have to vigorously rub in, because it is ‘too much effort’ and opted for the spray on one.

I’ve also managed to visit the cinema an impressive number of times, spend, what I can only presume is, a record number of hours in cinnamon square eating muffins, and keep up to date with the new series of One Tree Hill as it comes out in the US.

I know, I must not gloat.

I will leave you now. Perhaps you are not like me and are reading this whilst gulping down a cup of coffee, brushing your teeth and shaving your legs (if you are male… well… I’m not judging). Or perhaps you are like me; its 11.30 am, you are still in your pyjamas and considering in what order you should eat cake, watch the many television programmes previously set aside for today and, if you’re feeling particularly adventurous, sit in front of your laptop for around 12 minutes before deciding “that’s enough work for today” and heading out to a friends house to eat more cake and watch more television.

Have a nice day.

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